I surely can't be the only one curious as to what band this is...
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
I second Zues's comment. If you post a picture of yourself and OW then your W will see right through it, she'll KNOW you're doing it to get a rise out of her. It will backfire on you. But post a few random pics of the concert and maybe some comments about how awesome it was and it's going to eat at her. She'll be dying to know who you were there with. She'll probably poke and prod and pry and eventually find out anyway so you don't need to wave it in her face. It's better if you don't. After all, it's none of her business, right?
Agreed. There will be no posted photos of Sue and I. Strictly band shots and random concert shots. I think you guys are right. There will be no pic of Sue and I posted. As far as which band it is...I'd love to tell you all but the both of us are known by many as huge fans and are associated with this band by many and I just can't risk this thread showing up in a web search. If WAW ever saw this entire thread it would be totally catastrophic.
Ste7e...I can't tell you how happy that makes me! Yes, I remember those hopeless, painful days very well. They seem like you have nothing anymore. No future is possible without WAW. But somehow one day it just doesn't hurt anymore. You learn to live with it. For me I just always held out hope that one day WAW and I would meet again. That day finally came a month ago or so. So yes it makes me so happy that newbies use my story as inspiration. My best advice to newbies is to think of the future and work on your own life. You just NEVER know what the future holds in terms of your WAW. I never thought she'd come back...but she sure did. The future is NOT at all what you picture it to be while in that intense despair... trust me. Hang tough and work on building your new life...so when it's your turn to meet up with your WAW...you'll have your full arsenal of confidence and will be ready for anything! Trust me!
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
I think you should handle it organically... If there's a fun or nice pic of you and your friend, then post it... Just don't do it to get a reaction... Be natural... You never know, additional info may reveal itself in comments your friends make... Are you going to tell your friend not to tag you in her FB stuff that night?
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Sorry typo above... Hi Arista, She'll do whatever I ask her to. I doubt she would although she was going to post on my page with a pic of us at a concert we went to a couple years back. I wasn't sure if that was a good idea though. I think I'm just going to not post any pics other than the concert itself. She can wonder who went with me if she wants to. Part of me wants her to know and makes me want to post...but the other side of me agrees to not post anything with Sue...just the concert. I think that's the best plan no?
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
You guys, is this serious? lol. This does not read like a thread written by mature 40-somethings, but more like a group of teenagers trying to trick the popular girl into liking him! I mean think about it, IH, have you not already done the hard work of DB-ing? That was 4 years ago right? And even then, don't we learn not to DB to win them back or fool them into thinking something about us? The point is to take the focus off them and live for you.
Okay, so here is my difference perspective, because you are in a different position than most of the posters. Ever heard the phrase, "keep it simple, stupid!"? I don't think it really matters who you take and what she will think about them, what photos you take and post, and how that will affect her attraction to you. I mean what are you actually afraid will happen? ... Because your mental energy analyzing all these details is the only issue I see here. ... You are good now, you don't need to stress about all this!
Quite simply, who do you want to go with most? Your XW, right? SO JUST ASK HER! Quit playing games! Have no expectations and be confident. And if she can't go, no big deal, then you shake it off, ask the next person, and you still get to have a good time.
Ask the person you will have the best time with, not the hot girl to make her jealous. And if you happen to take photos and you happen to feel like posting them, then do so, but not for any reason that has to do with her or what she will think. None of these choices should be made based on what you think her reaction will be.
These are the actions of a confident and strong man! Ask the right girl for you and be okay with her saying no.
LIVE FOR YOU. No more games!
Blu
“Forgiveness liberates the soul. It removes fear. That is why it is such a powerful weapon.” – Nelson Mandela
