WW in MLC affair and I need advice..

[Natash]

Thank you guys and girls for the advice, compliments, recommendations, and support. I was not surprised my WW moved her stuff out but I was surprised by her timing and that she took everything.

Update/journaling/ and any advice or critiques welcome:

Sunday was a big day for me. I have never lived alone and it was the first day in my new world. In the past, my w did all the groceries and cooking. Since BD I've started to learn to make meals, assisted with groceries several times and got them one weerk on my own. I decided that Sunday id plan the meals for the week and let my girls pick which meals they wanted to have while they were with me (Determined by my W to be Saturday thru Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday with her,etc). I took the girls to Walmart and who's vehicle for they spot? Mom's. It wasn't too far into the store we run into my W who is struggling. The first thing she says after saying hi is " can I have a hug" while breaking down crying. I struggled here because I know I need to be careful of the WW and waterworks. A small part of me felt bad but I was glad she saw me making it on my own. I felt a boost of confidence. I am fully capable of planning and shopping for the meals while spending time and having fun with my girls. I did give her a hug as i figured it was the right thing to do especially in front of my girls. She asked me if I needed help and I said "nah, D7 knows where most of the stuff is" She continued to follow us around for a bit checking out what I had picked up and Wondering what we were going to have for meals. I acted uninterested and focused on shopping. It was almost as if in her mind it was like old times when we would go shopping and push two carts around.

Later that day she texted me and asked if she could have the girls some since it was Mother's day. I reminded her that this separation was her idea and her timeframe and the kid schedule was set by her...she could have waited a week until after mother's day. In the end, I did say she could have the girls for a few hours. I knew that if Father's day was her day with the girls, I'd appreciate a few hours with them too. She picked the girls up at noon and texted me at 2:30 "when would youike the girls back?" Mr NG would have said whenever so I replied ASAP. When WW got home I had just got my tractor stuck in a wet spot in the lawn and was getting my truck to pull it out. WW says "so glad I hurried the girls back and all your doing is mowing, I could have spent more time with them" I said I was mowing but now am stuck. I won't be mowing now the girls are here. We need to finish building the trampoline (a Xmas gift to daughters from WW an I) and get ready to go to an early dinner out with my mom. She replied oh, ok then. I took my mom and dad out with the girls and I and we had a nice meal and time together.

Monday morning my wife delivered D7 fleece jacket by hanging it on the door knob on her way to work...she walked right by the trampoline. Monday night I get a text "can I come see the trampoline tomorrow night?" I started to respond " It looks the same as it did this morning. Something smells fishy, what do you really want?" I thought about it for a bit, erased it all and replied "sure". As much as I wanted to be sarcastic, I want to be the lighthouse more. Tuesday morning right off, I get a text from WW (keep in mind it has been three nights but only one full day of not seeing the girls). She says she is struggling, doesn't know what to do but wants to change the schedule as five days with one parent is too much. I told her I tried voicing that concern and was told "everyone else does this schedule and we'll adjust." She admitted it probably isn't the best even if everyone else she talked with followed it. I told her we'd have to sit down face to face and discuss this new 2-2-3 schedule before I could answer. So Tuesday night she came over to "see the trampoline" after working late. she texted me to tell me she had worked late to gain hours she'd be missing and that she just left work (I'll touch base on the hours gained Shortly) but I was surprised as even when living at home these past 4 months she wouldn't update me via a text. I had made tacos and used the rest of the hamburger and made meatballs for spaghetti in the future. I told the WW there is enough tacos that she could have some if she'd like so she sat down and the four of us had a meal. She thanked me and uncharacteristically picked up her plate, rinsed it, and put it in the dishwasher. I shouldn't have but I said " you haven't done any of that in the past, no need to start now" She said she's a big girl and can handle it. So back to the extra time my wife accrued...she told me she was going to get out of work each day the girls are with her two hours early. Up until now, the girls always came to my office after school where Grammy (my mom) helped watch them. I said to my W, it seems you are trying to avoid going there. She said "I am, I don't won't to face your mother. She never liked me until we had kids". I told her that wasnt true and there is no need to have anxiety around my mother (my w does not know but my M has been kept in the loop all along and has not treated my WW any different than normal). I told my W that if she changed the kids afternoon schedule, it's one more change for then to deal with and my parents enjoy spending an hour each day with their grandkids. I let her know it will be ok and if she feels anxious or awkward at all to let me know. My W in tears thanked me and said she'd try it out.
I suggested to my W to take the girls the next two nights and I'll switch Thursday night with her. So she did.

Today went well with her picking up the girls at my work but tonight she called me crying saying D5 has cried all night long.She asked her if she wanted to go back and be with dad and he said no. nothing was working. "I don't know what to do, do they cry all the time when with you?" she said. I so wanted to say yoy walked out on your marriage and family, the girls are heart broken and now your coming to me for answers? Instead I said "I don't know what to tell you" This upset her as sshe started to talk and said never mind. I spoke up and said please don't start explaining something and cut it short with nevermind. She continued on by saying she was looking for some help and didn't know what to do. I asked her if she had comforted my D5 and tried talking with her. She hadn't but said she'd try. I viewed this as my W is unable to appease her own child and WW actions are causing W more grief than she had planned oon. I got to talk with both my Daughters at bed time and got D5 to calm down a bit. Later on I got a text from WW saying everything was better,she was just dealing with three emotional girls.

On another note, I have a few things of my W around the house like her dresser and her cat. She said she'd come get the cat but hasnt and would get the dresser later. I'm working on dropping the rope and don't want reminders/belongings around. The cat was a gift from me to her (and i Don't like cats). Is now the right time to tell the w her stuff is in the garage and to come get it? Deliver the cat to her? Or would it be best to hold off a little bit?