definitely go, and make plans for doing things without him IF he is going for work.
More later, but this is a good sign and you want to appreciate his offer.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
Go and have fun. Leave the expectations at home and relax a bit. Be sure to thank him for inviting you on this trip when you return home.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I’ll give a different point of view. W just asked me to go on a trip with her and I declined. Ask yourself the d b question. Will it make things better or worse? If better, absolutely go. But for me, the extended amount of alone time together I don’t think would be good for me and where we are right now. It just didn’t feel right so I declined. I think she was surprised. I think I even surprised myself.
Gordie 40s W 40s M20+ kids 2016 BD W fantasy affair w OM1 I do everything wrong 2017 I start to DB W says TLTL files for D PA w OM2 2018 I do LRT W drops filing and OM2 situation slowly improving
Hi Gordie, I appreciate the idea you shared with me.
Husband is coming out of the tunnel step by step, thank God for his grace ! I have to say the past four years were the most horrible experience I had in my life. I'm the survivor from his crisis (everybody can !)
He might not need my help when stepping out from that crisis, I want to be the light and support when he needs it, husband and I are changed, the way we see things, the way we act/react. 'Growing' I should say, the mistake I made when I entered in marriage life with him was I stopped growing. I want things be still, without any change, which is impossible ! I must say I was hurtful and it was really painful when he was deep in the mist of crisis, the projection, the other women (there were two) the verbal abuse, the deny of our relationship... but I know it was not him, he was bundling with his terrible past.
He asked me for such short trip before he entered into his crisis, I always say 'No'. I was quite selfish, I only do things I like, I love, I enjoying doing. Now I would love to be the 'partner' when he wants to explore new things.
It is 100% ok for you to decline it. You do whatever you like and willing to
Wow Babe just read into your situation. You truly are the epitome of a PATIENT person. I hope that i can find the strength in me to be half the person you have been. Good luck and continue with what you are doing, seems to be working. And by all means go on the vacation and enjoy yourselves!!
M:26 WAW:26 T:11 M:7 D:3 BD 1 10/16 I love you but not in love BD 2 2/18 I love you but... W moves out 3/18
Newly20, I learned from this board; three things be remembered - 1) Get a life of your own, like your spouse will never return.. I had problem in swallowing this, but I just have to focus on me, take good care of yourself. 2) Patient, it requires patient, dig deep and don't give up. 3) keep the expectation to zero, even now, I'm reminded by a lot of people here
Very well said. There is one more point...read the advice, take from the advice what you can apply to your own situation.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Hi everyone, I noticed few things, I don't know they are bad or good... I'm fine, husband comes back during weekend, we do don't see each other during weekdays. Recently, if he doesn't feel like coming, I won't ask him to.
These few months, he complained his job, however he is turning 43 this fall, he doesn't think he could get the job he likes now. I have no option to offer and I don't want to either. All I could do it 'listen' he talks.
Another thing; he cursed his mother few times 'better to die', thus I suspect his mother is the 'authority figure'... Still, I feel his regression a bit these days.
Most of the times, he's been doing much better in every ways. I'm continuing my language class and live my life in a calm and peaceful way.
Hello everyone, I'll be leaving for the trip with husband in two days. I'll see what happen during the trip and meantime I will still keep the expectation to zero and enjoy my time in Seoul !
