Advice on my Scenario Pt. 6 - Becoming a Warrior

[OrangeK]

You will never get answers because there are none. Believe me, we ALL want answers and it's frustrating not to know. There are no answers because your W doesn't know why she is doing what she's doing. She is confused and in turmoil even though she probably doesn't show it. I remember everyone telling me this and I would say "but you don't see my W on a day-to-day basis, she is rock-solid, resolute and completely unemotional." It wasn't until some time later (a year maybe) that my ex told me she cried every day and constantly questioned everything she was doing. Outside she looked like the Rock of Gibraltar, inside she was a raging storm of emotions.

This is hands down, bar-none one of the most helpful paragraphs that has been thrown my way on this website. Thank you. She literally said verbaitum, several times "You keep asking me questions i DONT HAVE ANSWERS TO, i told you I DONT KNOW" when i would ask if she had feelings for me anymore, if she loved OM, if she wanted divorce, etc. So this was huge to hear for me. Its been over a year for my WW, and i dont anticipate any admissions of guilt any time soon, but it doesnt mean it isnt happening.

The first part is absolutely untrue, the 2nd part is spot-on. What is true bravery? Is it rushing in where angels fear to tread? NO, bravery is being truly afraid and doing what needs to be done DESPITE your fears. Of course warriors have all those thoughts and fears and concerns and questions. What makes them warriors is that despite it all, they do what is right by their children, their family, their friends and (lastly) themselves.

Thank you. Again, this helped a lot to hear. Its true to, as a firefighter we often say "you must know fear to know bravery, all brave men are scared, it is action in the face of fear that makes bravery"
I should have never forgotten that.