My Scenario Pt.5 - Big D and Detaching the Monster

[OrangeK]

Had a rough weekend and morning with S3.
WW doesnt seem to get him to bed at a reasonable hour, so any day after she has him he is difficult and easily upset.

I have been trying my best to maintain during these episodes.

It boggles my mind how she can be going through all of this and not seeing how deeply this is effecting him, and the fact that she didnt even consider what would happen to him when she left the Martial Household and the ripple effect that would cause infuriates me. The most shining example of her putting her needs and wants first. She didn't even stop to consider the ramifactions on him.

He gets upset at trivial little things like if a snack isn't opened the right way, or when he doesn't want socks on.
These seem normal for a three year old, but they seem to me to be amplified. When he gets upset when he is around me he has been crying "Maaamaaaaa maaaamaaaaa" a lot. i mean A LOT.
This has me wondering 1 of two things.
Either he veiws me as "the bad guy" and he just wants her to console him, (she has always been a pushover with him, not good at keeping boundaries or being a disciplinarian)
or
He isn't seeing her nearly enough and when he is upset he cries for her because he misses her. She can see him all day Wednesday as that is her day off, and the one day of the week she has him all day. Instead of spending her day off with her son, she pays to take him to daycare so she can spend the day on herself or with OM. She has been doing this for about a year. The other day she has him on a day off is Saturday and i know there have been occasions where he spent the day with her parents, not her.

I brought some of this up to the daycare today and they told me "We notice he is better behaved on days you drop him off, we see that you have taken charge of parenting since the breakup"
I responded by saying "i didn't want to say anything, i dont want to be that parent in here trying to make her look bad, that isn't my goal. I just want S3 to be happy"

I just wanted my son to have a whole, happy family.
this [censored]. Poor guy....