WW in MLC affair and I need advice..

[Natash]

Well I'm back from my 7 day trip and it was amazing! 115 miles, record high water, snow still in places and saw 53 moose,otters,beavers,eagles,deer, two other paddlers and no clouds over the first 5 days! I did miss my daughters and on my drive back they called me to talk. Then the WW got on the phone and said we need to talk.

When I got home, the house was clean and everything of hers was gone. She told me she tried the under the same roof thing and anxiety meds but nothing's working and she was leaving and wanted my input about the talk with the girls. I told her that the girls had plans for bingo at school that night and a talk before that wouldnt be good. Neither would a talk at bedtime. I said she should get what she needs to stay the night and we would talk with the girls in the morning.She agreed and we gotta into a conversation. She mentioned in it we have both changed but I'm still selfish. We have a communication issue (my response was this is the first time in five months she initiated a conversation). She said she thought I was seeing someone else (because of my gal activities). I slipped and said absolutely not. She told me she is burnt out and nothing is working, not even the meds. Then continued it's time to stop putting the kids first and to put herself first. She has friends she wants to go out with but feels like she has to ask for permission first and that not right. She said she has regrets and needs time away from me. I had strong evidence EW had introduced my girls to OM and his D. I told my wife that I want it to be clear that the only men that need to be in our daughters lives are myself and their two grandfathrts. She said she respects my wish. Then she was going to her parents to grab some stuff for the night and she'd be back. I never heard the car start and she came back in balling. I asked her what the matter was and she said she should have never moved all of her stuff out like that and it was on impulse. I said I undrtstand, ive made some choices on impulse that i have regretted. I tried to stay strong but eyes did water at times. She grabbed some blankets and headed for the couch.In the morning we sat down with the girls and mom let them know she was moving out. They were heartbroken and wanted to know why we didn't talk it out and mom could stay. My W explained she needed time away from me and we will share them 50 percent. I lost it when I saw both my girls so visibly upset and I just handed then tissues and wrapped my arms around them both assuring them none if this is their fault and mom and dad love them so much. Around this same time I got confirmation that D5 told my mom that my W and two daughters had gone out to eat and mini golf with OM and his D. This is when I lost my calmness. I told her that I was done playing her game to leave our daughters out of this. She said "he's just a friend, it was innocent and is the reason I did not tell you". I said bullshit, you don't wait until your spouse goes our of town and go out to eat with another man PERIOD. It so happens to be the same guy you were texting and saying you loved him and lying to me about. I told you to stop the conversations and you lied about that. Now you're moving out and dating him and introducing the kids...so convenient. I told her stop thinking I'm ignorant and stupid I see what is happening. She swears they are not dating but I don't buy it. Is it right for me to ask my Daughters if they ever see him again? I know I can't control my WW but don't want the kids brought into this more than needed.

I'm at a different stage than I've ever been and looking for a few key pointers that have helped other separated folks?