Affair discovered

[Gerda]

STH, I am just writing a quick post to you to tell you that if MLC were 24 hours, you would be in the first millisecond of that 24 hours. You are at the big bang but you want to already be walking around on planet earth. I read that when I started and I didn't believe anyone. Then I thought it would be 2 years. I'm in year five and I just got rebombed. I'm not saying that will happen to you; I'm just saying, take a deep breath and stop trying to fix this. You can't fix it yet. It's true what everyone says -- you have to pull away completely and work on yourself and let her go. I came to Christ through my stand for my marriage. It's long, it's slow, but it's also beautiful. God will give you graces beyond imagining during this journey through the fire. If you are a Catholic, don't apologize, use it! Faith may be the best way for you to stand and it will certainly be the best way for you to forgive her daily for all the stuff she is doing and will do. Read Hosea, talk to a priest who believes in the sanctity of marriage. The more you commit yourself to the stand, the more you will be able to do it. Your obsession over the A is totally normal, but it's not true. It may be true that horrible things are happening, but it's not true that it's the end of your marriage -- greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world! Get ready for your spiritual battle, you can do this! Check out Rejoice Ministries, it will help you a lot if you want to lean on your faith. The movie "Fireproof" also was pivotal for me, and I did the Love Dare many times over, but your W may not respond to it at all for a long while.

You can't fix this yet. You have to take a deep breath and step back. You can do it, you can do it, God will help you, I promise!