Newbie In Need Of Guidance #3

[rminer]

So our 25th anniversary has come and gone. I wouldn't say it was a rousing success, but I don't think I lost any ground either. I didn't do anything over the top, but I did do something unexpected.


When I left in the morning I left a card on the counter where she would see it. I didn't get mushy but there was some feeling to what I wrote. Normally, I give her a card and gift in the evening when I get home from work, so I think she thought that was all I was going to do.


In the early afternoon I had a dozen roses delivered to her. This is something I have only done once before (I usually give flowers to her myself), so it was surprising to her. Shortly after they arrived she texted me a three line message. All she said was that she was confused when the delivery van pulled in to the driveway, they were beautiful and thank you. The message was just matter of fact, so I thought it didn't mean much to her.


A few hours later I noticed a Facebook notification, so I checked. She posted a picture saying how beautiful they were, how I can still surprise her and how she loved them. She spent the rest of the day liking and replying to comments.


When I got home, it was as it usually is lately. No major excitement. D15 waited until my W left the room and then told me that my W was very excited when she saw the delivery van and that she smiled when she read my card. This was a bit of a relief because I wasn't sure if she truly liked them or not even though she posted about it. According to D15, my W "ran" to the door when they came.


We didn't go to dinner because of the kid's activities and the hour, so we are planning on going out tomorrow. The rest of the night we sat in the family room, had a few drinks and talked until 3am about nothing in particular. Very similar to when we were still dating. We didn't have an R talk - the closest we came was moving and the family vacation she is planning. We just talked about life in general.


My W gave me a card, but it wasn't what she usually gives. It was simply a humor card with a nice note. She said that she was thankful for our children and the life we had built together. Not what I hoped for, but it was at least some acknowledgment. I honestly figured she wouldn't do anything, so I can't complain too much.


As I said, I didn't lose ground, but I am left with a few questions that I need to answer for myself.