I accidentally left my phone on the charger at the house this morning too. I'm curious as to how many missed calls and texts I'll have when I get home. Starting out nice and sweet, and then building into rage about ignoring her....
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
I think her getting served with D papers might be something that would snap her out of it. That stuff just got real. I think right now she thinks she can still just turn on the charm and reel you back in whenever she wants to.
It's possible, but I doubt it. Who knows though. She's gonna have to walk through fire for any chance of R with me. I tried. She didn't want to. She left me 5 years ago after 5 years of M for 6 months doing the same thing. This isn't something I want to go through every 5 years. And it's gonna take A LOT to convince me that it wouldn't happen again...
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
Text 1 was something about being back to ignoring her. Text 2 was that i really need to call or text her. And she was not contacting me for any other reason tham the kids. Text 3 was how is she supposed to make plans and not just show up if i don't respond...
I told her in the past to be more specific in her text and I would reply, But most of the time it just "Can you call me" And when I would, I'd get roped into an argument about something stupid...
She said she wanted to know what park D's softball game was at tonight. Wouldn't it have been a lot easier to just send a text that said, "Where is D's softball game at tonight?". I'm not playing her games anymore...
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
Day before yesterday, W promised D she we be at her game tonight. W sent the texts in the above post today at 4:00 asking where the game was. The game was at 5:30. At 5:00, W shows up in the driveway to tell D she isn't going to make it to her game. That she had to go to her grandma's house to get money to pay her power bill. D was not upset because W ptomised she would be at the next game and take her out for ice cream and all sorts of other fantastic $hit that will probably never happen. I wanted to ask W why she couldn't go to the game and then to her grandma's house. The game was done by 6:45. She could have made it to grandma's house a little after 7:00. Could it possibly be that she wasn't going to grandma's??? Could it be that the lady she buys pills from gets her script filled on the 10th each month and it's a 45 minute drive to get there??? Who knows. All I know is she could have made it to the game if she wanted to, but all her actions show that it's just not important enough for her...
W also asked me how my appointment went. I just said fine. Then she asked if I filed for D. My reply was, "Isn't that what you wanted?" No amswer from her, the she asked, "Well, did you?". To which I replied, "Isn't that what you wanted?". Her response, "I'll take that as a yes". She then got mad and asked why we couldn't just talk and be civil. I told her I was being civil, and then told her that the kids and I needed to get on the road so we weren't late for the game...
Also, W wanted me to ask my parents to not go to daughter's game next week, because she feels uncomfortable around them. I told her, "No. You can ask them if you want to, but I doubt they will. They like supporting D and try to make it to all of her games. They really enjoy it"...
Poor W is starting to have to deal with all the consequences of her decisions, and I don't think she thought it would be like this. As she was walking back to the van, a song popped into my head and the chorus has been stuck there all night. The song Ticks and Leeches by Tool...
"Hope this is what you wanted Hope this is what you had in mind Because this is what you're getting"...
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
What was her body language when she was asking if you filed? I know that my WW look like I had slapped her when I said I had contact a divorce attorney. She of course was delusional about a non-lawyer, quickie online divorce. My contacting a lawyer really burst that fantasy bubble. My guess is that your W is feeling a similar pang of "uh oh, stuff just got real".
She probably played it cool, but her head is spinning that you just took a huge leap out of the MR and out of her realm of control.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
I wasn't really paying too much attention to her at the time, but the tone of her voice did have a little bit of that "uh-oh" in it. That and the fact that she asked twice makes me think that she is concerned a little bit. She sure is stubborn though. Even if she does realize that she's made a mistake, I don't think she'd do anything to rectify it. She's past the point of no return by telling all her family and friends lies about me. If she did decide to come back, she'd have to admit to them that she was full of $hit or make up a bunch of more lies to cover up the other ones. I believe she would choose the latter, but I believe even more that she'll just continue down the path she's on because she has too much pride and can never admit to being wrong...
Her fantasy world has made a huge shift in the past 2 weeks. The catalyst was getting fired from the bartending job. She rode a pretty high horse and thought that being the manager there made her something special. Got lots of attention. Late nights partying and keeping the bar open after hours for her "friends". Suddenly all that was gone. She's horribly financially irresponsible too, so even though she was making good money, she immediately spent it frivolously, mostly on drugs and clothes. Didn't save up for anything. So now she's broke, unemployed, and lost one of her main sources of attention. Goes around begging her family for money to pay her bills. Signed that lease on her new place for a year and now is struggling to just pay the power bill. Her life isn't so fantastic now, but like I said, I'm afraid she's too prideful and stubborn to admit that she screwed up. And who knows, maybe she does just hate me and has no desire to be with me. Whatever... Her loss...
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
Yeah, and apparently OM is in no hurry to have her live with him. I think she has hit rock bottom several times, and continues to bounce around down there.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Yeah, and apparently OM is in no hurry to have her live with him. I think she has hit rock bottom several times, and continues to bounce around down there.
No way OM will let her move in with him. He has a history of taking advantage of and playing women. That and his house is not much bigger than a tool shed. I'm not sure if you've seen endofit's Woke thread, but he is using the playbook he described in there. 1)Be a friend with a listening ear 2)Use info gained in step 1 to his advantage 3) Be the knight in shining armor while LBS is losing their **** and chasing WW. Well, guess what. I'm not chasing anyone anymore. It's funny how accurate that description is though. For the past few months WW has been telling me bout how OM is such a good friend and she really needed a friend like that with the tough time she's going through. He's such a good listener. The only reason he sent me the aggressive texts the other night was because he cares about her as a friend and wants her to be safe. yada yada yada...
Me: 38 W:31 Kids: S16(mine from previous R), D10, S9, S4 M: 10 years T:12 years BD:Jan 3, 2018 W moved out: Apr 13,2018 Filed for D: Jun 2018 D final: Sep 2019
