Bit of a wobbler last week, but back on track now.
Looking back over the past couple of years...
I've made some friendships that I feel are very strong. I've particularly enjoyed making friends outside of XH's industry, so people are meeting me and relating to me for who I am. That's been an amazing confidence boost.
I've done things I never imagined I would do (and plenty more of those sorts of things to do in the future, for sure). Some of those have now been with the wonderful man I'm with, and I'm particularly appreciative of that.
The work part of my life has become a lot stronger, solid and I feel more confident about it. That's a direct result of the effort I've put into it. I feel like I've earned my place and can stand on my own two feet in the working world.
My physical fitness has improved incredibly. I'm very proud of that. Still more to learn and do on that front.
I don't have insomnia any more. I had it for years and years and years, sleeping only 4 hours a night every night. It got very bad a one point and I was down to 2 or 3 hours sleep a night. I don't have insomnia any more and I can say that I sleep very well.
I'm rambling. I don't know why I felt it was important to look back and appreciate how far I've come at this point.
Perhaps because I don't have the feeling of wishing I could go back to the person I was, or better...go back to the way I thought about the world before this all happened.
I know the world will never be the same again, but what I have learned about myself has made me stronger that I was before. That's not to discount or forget about the pain and suffering behind it all. But just that I feel more capable now, and able to stand on my won two feet and not only survive, but thrive.
Would I ever speak to XH again? No. Door Slam on that one, for sure. And that's down to his behaviour and his treatment of me.
