Get your balls back means. Stop acting like a family with your W. Your W wants to come with you to your parents house. Why? She is cheating with your BIL. Stop acting like a M couple. She has given up having mother's day like a M couple, she cheating and she has filed D.
Get your balls back means, stop tolerating what your W and BIL are doing. Stop calling your W at work. Stop having dinner with your W at home. Get out the house on your own. Detach, stop being afraid to lose your W, because frankly at this point she is not afraid to lose you.
Let her go. Let go of the DEAD M, you are currently in. You can never go back to that M. If your W and you Recon, you and your sister will have to not deal with each other no more. Is that what you want?
Your W wants to be with BIL, walk up to your W and say I'm fighting for 50/50 custody and the house. I want just stand around allow you to make me a weekend dad.
Are you tired of being in this Sitch yet? If so walk up to your W and say I'm done (you have to mean it). Does that mean you'll can't get back together in the future, No.
And I agree your W has to feel what's its like to not have you around, but not for just a weekend but for the rest of her life. She must feel that you will never come back. And you have to be completely done for that to happen.
You want a chance to get your W back, start respecting yourself by not tolerating what your W is doing. Stop doing things with her that make her feel comfortable at having a family life on one end and her AP on the other.
M:37 W:37 T:11 M:10 S17, S13, S10, S4 BD:06/28/17 OM confirmed 07/20/17 Recon the M 10/29/17 Working hard:2gether
Onward and forward
This process is not a sprint it's a marathon! Patience, Patience, Patience.
