Let's talk a little about what constitutes pursuing.

Complementing her dress=persuing
Calling MIL= pursuing

I know you harbor resentment. We all do. It will get easier. Stay busy and don't spend too much time alone. It will get easier.

Yes, get your own attorney. It's a lot easier and cheaper than challenging a divorce decree later.

M 53 W 54, M since 98
D15, D19
8/2013 discovered EA, W maintained contact with OM
until 10/14
7/2/17 W said she wanted S, 7/25/17 moved out of MBR
12/17 W says moving out 5/18, W still in home.