Wife is not who I married...please help

[LoneWlf]

Vanilla, Steve 85, Andrew,Cadet,Another Stander, RR17,JoeJoe1 and for all the people I missed and that have come here to help me out...I'm pretty sure we all came here hurting depleted of energy, feeling worthless and unloved and so totally lost. (At least that's how I feel now.) For each and every one of you who's gone out of your way to share your knowledge and wisdom or even if it's just cheering a person on from the sideline. I think it shows me the type of character that you all are. you guys are incredible!! To be kicked when you are down, to constantly rise up not only to persevere but help the next person next to you. It speaks volumes. And for this I am grateful.

In regards to my S and my W relationship. Let me first say I am a God fearing man. And his commandments Love one another. Love unconditionally. Be quick to extend grace and be slow to anger. he also says, be humble and put others needs above your own. That being said, I have told my S that this is his mom and she deserves his respect no matter what. I also told him that the longer he keeps anger and resentment in him the longer it will take for him to heal. The analogy the gave him was if you don't for give someone- it's like swallowing poison and waiting for the other person to die. Forgiveness is more for you then it is for them. it doesn't mean they get a free pass and you just forget everything. It means you acknowledge that you were wronged but you now are more focussed on healing.

The fact that this woman who gave birth to my S walks around emotionless when S asks her why she wants to break up the family? When in fact the woman I married would cry at ALL Disney movies( I would even get my S to joke with her and tell him to ask mommy why her eyeballs were sweating?)She has become someone I don't know. Not the Godly woman I married. At this point I'm not sure who she is or if my REAL W still exists. Only time will tell>my only course of action now is to DB - work on myself while continuing to pray for her salvation. I also must trust in GOD in that he has a plan for me. I must let go of my prideful ways and allow Him to take full control and be obedient to His will.