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sandi2, I need to get our sitch to some conclusion as far as the D is concerned. I don't want to be seen as dragging my feet and she has made it quite clear that our M is over and she wants to be with the OM. I have done my best to go NC and am working hard to GAL, but she keeps drawing things out and not communicating what she needs from me for legal situation.

Should I just make a decision and let her worry about what to do? I feel like I need to do something. All of our communication at this point is through texts and I know how you can read tone into them.

Even though I still have feelings for her I know that I cannot entertain thoughts of reconciling with her (not that that would come up now).


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Me-53 W-50
T-16 M-13
Bomb drop 1-16-18
Discovered EA 1-23-18
Discovered PA 2-2-18
Still involved with OM
WW moved out 3-29-18
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Quote:
Should I just make a decision and let her worry about what to do?


Exactly! Do what is best for you, and stop giving her options.


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
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Any thoughts on which is better. Need to discuss financial and or divorce business with the W. Should I text her or call her at last I knew we were able to talk, however everything recently has been by text.


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Me-53 W-50
T-16 M-13
Bomb drop 1-16-18
Discovered EA 1-23-18
Discovered PA 2-2-18
Still involved with OM
WW moved out 3-29-18
Joined: Jun 2007
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How about an update?


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
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Not much movement either way. Wife and I only communicate by text and only about her getting her things from the house. I have been battling my NGS with reguards to calling her about refi of house, apraisal, equity buyout, tax returns and horses and trailer situation. She and her mother keep wanting me to not be around when they come to get things from the house because it makes it harder on everyone.
I have been working on GAL and 180's as much as I can and some work on NGS. Got some help over the weekend cleaning up the garage and mud room. On that front, I had a dumpster brought out and it happened to show up the same time as my W and her sister and nieces to load more of her things. I have been working on unfinished projects in the house and I bought a new bed and bedroom furniture. Went thru my closet and dresser and got rid of a bunch of clothes I no longer wear(she was always on me to do that). I know this will just be too little to late for her, but I needed to do this for me.
You see, I realized that a lot of what went wrong with us is we didn't take care of the We it was her and I. I can see that we let work stress and other things get in the way and I went into victim mode and changed the way I was. these past several years I was not who I was when we got together and were happy as a couple.
I'm not sure where things are going from here. I just know that I don't want to get stuck hoping for something that may never happen. That being that we could get back together. She is still with the OM. I know that I can't worry about them and what they are doing all I can do is take care of me and be a better person than I was. It is still difficult to go home to an empty house and cook dinner for myself. Then there is the lack of conversation I experience daily. My work is pretty much spent in solitude and then home to the same.
Hope to have something to report after tonight I have to make that phone call about the D and financial matters.


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Me-53 W-50
T-16 M-13
Bomb drop 1-16-18
Discovered EA 1-23-18
Discovered PA 2-2-18
Still involved with OM
WW moved out 3-29-18
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Soooooooo......what GAL activities have you been engaging in? There is no reason to sit at home in solitude. Get out and do things. Meet new people. That's what get a life is all about.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
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Originally Posted By: Steve85
Soooooooo......what GAL activities have you been engaging in? There is no reason to sit at home in solitude. Get out and do things. Meet new people. That's what get a life is all about.

I live in a rural setting 8 miles outside of a town of 18,000 and have animals to care for. My main concern is the dog who is penned up all day.
Its no like I don't do anything to be around people and until I get this budget figured out I can't spend alot of money. The house will still be empty when I get home. I know what I have to do its just doing it.


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Me-53 W-50
T-16 M-13
Bomb drop 1-16-18
Discovered EA 1-23-18
Discovered PA 2-2-18
Still involved with OM
WW moved out 3-29-18
Joined: Feb 2018
Posts: 9,829
Likes: 240
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Well, you can continue to make excuses, or you can look for ways not to sit all day at work and all night at home and stew in your juices.


M(53), W(54),D(19)
M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017
Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Joined: Aug 2017
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Along,

Please 180 your forum name. Get out and make some friends and enjoy life. YOLO. Like Steve said don't stew.


M:37 W:37
T:11 M:10
S17, S13, S10, S4
BD:06/28/17
OM confirmed 07/20/17
Recon the M 10/29/17
Working hard:2gether

Onward and forward

This process is not a sprint it's a marathon! Patience, Patience, Patience.
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