Yes you can keep talking to her family, but change your messaging from "Hey, she is doing this, help me keep her married to me." to "W is going through a tough period, please continue to love and support no matter what she decides."
Your goal, today and for the foreseeable future is to remove all pressure from your wife to stay. I guarantee you that if you pressure her to stay, have others put pressure on your W to stay, that it will push her out the door and in short order.
Remove all pressure. YOU HAVE TO LET HER GO TO GET HER BACK. All of this, as joejoe referred to, is going to feel counter intuitive. It is going to feel like the exact opposite of what you should be doing. But trust us, this approach gives you the best chance (no guarantees) of saving your marriage.
For some context about my sitch and how it turned around fairly quickly, please read my post at the top of this page:
