Your wife is not doing "the work." And you are not requiring her to do, "the work." When you decided to reconcile, did you have any "must haves?" Or were you simply so relieved to have her back that you allowed things/issues to be swept under the rug? Unless you two have a plan that you both are committed to, I don't see you as truly piecing... You are maintaining the status quo... There is no thriving in your relationship...
When my H allowed me to come back, he would never have put up with me behaving as your wife is currently behaving...
