O - In some respects your W sounds a little like my EW (the newness of things). I never realized it when I was married to her but looking back my EW always had to have a project or something going on to occupy her time. It was always something "new" and thoughts of it would occupy her all day, every day until she accomplished the task or project and then she would move on to something else. She could never just be still.
I never thought it would manifest itself on me or the kids but now getting D and transitioning her life has been her next project. I firmly believe my EW will continue to do this for the rest of her life until she learns to be happy with who she is and what she has in life. It will continue to impact any other R she has and it will only change IMO if she gets help.
It took me some time but with that and distance I was able to get clarity on my sitch. I know the pain is real but I think as you get stronger you will grow and realize the same things about your sitch as well.
