My plan for the future is to be friendly with her, but not over do it until I am ready. It may take awhile before I can actually be her friend, but I really do want that. Time apart and getting my own life together will help. We will be in each others lives forever thanks to our kids, and at this point I think being friends is the best thing that we can give them. If they aren't going to see us work through our problems to stay married, they can at least see us as a united parental unit that cares for them and treats each other with love and respect. Eventually, I hope to be strong enough to have the four of us sit down and have dinner as a family on a regular basis with no feelings of regret or lingering sadness.
I agree with you. I hope you will give effecient space and time before trying to be her "friend". You can act friendly when swapping kids, etc., but that is different from being her BFF. I believe the attraction can return, if you don't settle into the mindset of a friend too quickly and let it happen naturally. I know you want to have some type of normalcy for your kids, by giving them time acting like a family again. I hope it will work to everyone's advantage, and that the four of you will be together again full time.
I have felt that your W had issues that stemmed from her past and had caught up with her. It good to hear she is getting better through counseling. With both of you growing individually......and finding yourselves......there is hope you will find each other again.
Don't forsake us on the board. We still want to hear from you, okay?
((hugs))
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
