Detachment is probably the most difficult thing to master, because it is indirectly in your control and takes time. You can't just summon detachment or meditate your way there.
There are some excellent resources here, and I believe there is a great sticky on detachment. Just read and re-read it.
It is virtually impossible to get to detachment just by trying to grind intellectually. You can't want it to happen - that's like trying to untie a knot by pulling harder. You're making the situation worse. You have to let it go and once the tension falls, you can gently start untying it.
Are you seeing an IC? I'd suggest you do that if you can. That will assist in your detachment journey.
You need to seriously GAL, expand your network, and learn how to do calming awesome things by yourself. What do I do - indoor climbing, working out, listening to music/podcasts, reading, cooking. I find small activities that give me that calm zen space of mind. Find yours and pursue it rigorously - this will add fuel to your detachment journey and the layers will start peeling off.
You can't muscle your way through this. You can't go around your pain. The best and most effective way is through the pain and you'll get to the other side better and unlocking different layers of detachment.
Slow down, give yourself breathing room, and start somewhere. With something. Doesn't have to feel authentic to start. but just start somewhere - if it doesn't feel too good, find something else.
Complete focus on YOU and your self-care. Detachment will come in waves.
