First off I disagree you did your man part by reaching out to her. You sent her a text about a song. That is something a woman would do.
You go out have a good time and create an opportunity for sex to happen. I didn’t say to go out and vomit your feelings all over her. I agree that she has to be the one who earns another chance with you but you have to initiate the date.
If you continue to act in this manner you will get rejected and friend zoned.
Well LH I appreciate your advice for sure but we all have to handle things in the way we think is right. In this case we obviously would handle differently...to each his own. At the end of the day it's about this second meeting actually happening by HER hand...not mine. And I am very very confident it will happen very soon handling the way i handled it. And when it does, I'm certainly not going to look back and question my method... conversely I am going to look back and think that everything happened the way I wanted it to...by my design. I am not going to initiate, set up, or in any way arrange anything with her. If she wants to see me...then she needs to get it done...and I am certain she will because of the way I handled this. Maybe I'm wrong and maybe she will never text again to set this up...and then I will have to logically consider that maybe I should've set up to date...however I don't believe I'm wrong and I believe she will indeed text me and set it up. If that happens and that goal of mine is realized, it wouldn't make sense to think I made a mistake. The end result is the desired one so the method I used would thereby be correct and successful. The only question that remains now is will she take that next step...and my strong suspicion is she will. It's just a matter of time before she texts me. But I do thank you for taking the time to share your viewpoint here. It's appreciated.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Again, I think your misunderstanding what I am saying. When and if she reaches out take the lead and make it clear by your actions not words you are only interested in romantic relationship.
Good luck and I will no longer comment on your thread.
Hi Guys, Just an update. WAW texted me this morning and invited me over for tonight. So the meeting is on. Ready for round 2. Hope everyone is well.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hi Guys! Well the meeting went very, very well. We had a genuine ggood time and lots of laughs. There was some talk of our marriage and what we both I'd wrong but it was a very pleasant conversation. She did seem very interested in what she called " the string of women you've ripped through" in the past 4 years. She also was asking about Mary as well. She saw me get a text from Mary come in while my phone was on the table so she asked about that. But other than that it was a really nice light-hearted visit. We did laugh a lot over some memories quite a bit through the night... sometimes to the point of tears LOL! She remembered things I'd forgotten and vice versa. I wanted to be the one to end the night so I said I should go and it is getting late after about three hours. She had baked me some bananna bread and sent me home with some. So this was on Tuesday night. I figured it would be a couple weeks again before we'd chat or hang out until last night she stunned me and showed up at my work. I was well and truly shocked to see her standing there as it was a vision I'd had for 4 years and couldn't believe it was actually happening. We talked for a few minutes. She again asked how things went with Mary because she knew I had to go over there to get the rest of my things. I was vague and just left my answer as Mary and I had a good talk. Then she left. So that was pretty shocking. That was last night at work so who knows what happenals next but I played it super duper cool during both encounters. I find myself feeling like she is finding herself wanting to be with me more but I am just playing it cool for now. I'm feeling somewhat pursued by her and I want to see where that goes. But for now we've had three very pleasant encounters in just a month's time. Of course I will keep you all posted on any new developments. I hope everyone is well.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
Hi Guys! Well the meeting went very, very well. We had a genuine ggood time and lots of laughs. There was some talk of our marriage and what we both I'd wrong but it was a very pleasant conversation. She did seem very interested in what she called " the string of women you've ripped through" in the past 4 years. She also was asking about Mary as well. She saw me get a text from Mary come in while my phone was on the table so she asked about that. But other than that it was a really nice light-hearted visit. We did laugh a lot over some memories quite a bit through the night... sometimes to the point of tears LOL! She remembered things I'd forgotten and vice versa. I wanted to be the one to end the night so I said I should go and it is getting late after about three hours. She had baked me some bananna bread and sent me home with some. So this was on Tuesday night. I figured it would be a couple weeks again before we'd chat or hang out until last night she stunned me and showed up at my work. I was well and truly shocked to see her standing there as it was a vision I'd had for 4 years and couldn't believe it was actually happening. We talked for a few minutes. She again asked how things went with Mary because she knew I had to go over there to get the rest of my things. I was vague and just left my answer as Mary and I had a good talk. Then she left. So that was pretty shocking. That was last night at work so who knows what happenals next but I played it super duper cool during both encounters. I find myself feeling like she is finding herself wanting to be with me more but I am just playing it cool for now. I'm feeling somewhat pursued by her and I want to see where that goes. But for now we've had three very pleasant encounters in just a month's time. Of course I will keep you all posted on any new developments. I hope everyone is well.
WOW! ItHurts, the showing up at work thing is incredible! That is no question her pursuing you. No doubt about it. As long as you play it cool, walk the line between interest and aloofness, I think you are in. If you want to be and it sounds like you do.
If you two get back together please keep this forum updated! I have been using your sitch as an example of why you NEVER give up.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Hey there Steve! Yeah I have to say I was absolutely blown away when she showed up at my work last night! Of course I played it off as no big deal. I am doing exactly that...just not letting her know if I would want R or not. The subject hadn't really come up so I am just taking this as it comes. But yes, even my skeptical nature is at odds with her showing up at my work...it sure is hard to not take that as a very obvious sign of her persuing me. Her interest in the outcome with Mary is also a sign to me...like she wants to see if Mary and I are going to reconcile. So who knows what comes next but this is just crazy that after 4 years since my intense heartbreak that this is all happening so fast now. We'll see where it goes and yes my friend, I will most definitely keep you all posted.
ME: 43 W:44 M 13 years on 5-5-01 T 18 years BD 4/27/14 D papers served 5/5/14 (how appropriate a date) WAW moved out 5/12/14 Papers filed 6/27/14 Divorce granted 07/17/14 Our marriage ends 11/17/14
please tread lightly... if you know anything about me, it's that i am skeptical... i hope that after all this time she is not merely temp-checking... however, as a former WW who came back after years of separation, i am also hopeful...
in the words of a song by 38 Special--"Just hold on loosely..." which you seem to be doing...
