This is where the biggest benefit is for me now that I fully know of the A. I am a very mellow, even-tempered person and it's hard to get me angry. Now I have a source and as long as I keep it in check, I think I can harness it to help me be more firm. I never act sad or depressed, but she does frequently ask if I'm mad, even when I'm not. I know MWD says to be upbeat and pleasant, so I am trying to work on this as it clearly isn't the message I have been sending. I have been pretty serious and determined to go about my own business and I guess W mistakes it for anger. Other than times where she pushes and the anger/firmness is warranted, I am trying to be happier and more upbeat.
I want to encourage you here. If she is asking "are you mad" then you are probably doing detachment right! When I would detach well, my wife would always temp check me with a "is there something wrong?" As positively and upbeat as I could be without overdoing it I would respond with "Nope, everything is great!" You've already said that she is constantly temp checking, asking you what you are doing and did. So she is probably uber-sensitive to any changes you make. So if you detach properly she will take note. That may be her "are you mad?" is all about.
Concentrate on your detachment. How she reads it or interprets it is on her. So don't do change it based on her reaction. I think from what you have said you are doing really really well! So keep up the good work!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
