No affair, no feelings...is there hope?

[Olya]

Everything I read always talks endlessly about the importance of validation. I guess this isn't as applicable at this stage? This is part of the big, confusing dichotomy for me. How do I follow all these steps to be a better husband, while also detaching and letting go of that role? Part of my focus to be better just for myself is to be a better listener, communicator, and validator. This will help me in any future relationship, but it feels really blurry trying to incorporate it with a lot of the other DB techniques.

I think Olya used the wrong word there. I think what she meant was that you seem to be bending over into a pretzel over and over to appease your W. Why are you continuing to do that?

That is exactly what I meant. Thank you