I really am not very good at this standing thing. I'll go for a week or 2 of just cordial interaction and things seem to be ok, and then I wake up one day (like today) feeling somewhat like before BD and am sweet to her again. Maybe initiate intimate contact (not just sex, anything really). Then I get to be reminded that she isn't interested. Seems like I should have learned my lesson by now. Not even sure why I still want to try. Who likes being treated this way? If I were dating someone and they treated me that way I would drop them without looking back. Why do I still want to be with HER when treated like this?
The tricky part is that her behavior compared to others is so mild. She isn't super mom like she used to be, but she is still taking care of that responsibility. She doesn't take care of the house like she used to, but she does still help out. She isn't going out drinking with friends like she was at first, she isn't in an A, she isn't spending crazy amounts of money, etc. All that leads me to a false sense of hope that things are getting better. She does still focus a lot on her looks, plays on her phone for hours, although somewhat present with the kids...still a bit distant, and is not interested in a relationship with me without a reasonable excuse. She just has to be "true" to herself. She seems to have the MLC mindset while reigning in the crazier behavior. So, its hard for me because many things have returned to something a little more normal, but still nothing for me. If we had a bad relationship or something substantial that I had done to her I think I could understand it more...
Something has to give...I can't do this forever. At this point I am kind of hoping that she will move out so that I can recover myself a little. I'm just not sure I can do it while she is here. I know her moving out make me feel better initially, but I think with time I could detach better and move on. Maybe not...I'm just tired of feeling rejected, neglected, and confused.
