The hardest part of all of this, is realizing how much of a part of the deterioration of the marriage I am responsible for, and now losing hope on how to fix it. Still not sure if I initiate R talks at this point, try to get back to us sleeping together, or detach. I think it was my detachment that pushed us here to begin with.
It is scary! It is also bizarre to feel so scared after spending all of these years together.
