Hi Everyone, I have been on the road for a week now, with everything that has happened it feels much longer than that!
Leaving work was easier than I thought it would be; it had become my family and a place to bury myself in work to distract me from my personal life. I only left 2 weeks ago and it already feels like I was never there; this proves that leaving was the right decision for me. I still keep in touch with a few people there, they are keen to follow my trip and know what I get up to next.
I moved out of my house last Wednesday so have been on the road for a week now, and what a week it has been! The first night I camped at a marine reserve, the site was right on the beach and I was the only one there. Unfortunately the wind got up in the afternoon and I could not find shelter for my gas cooker, so I gave up and had a bottle of water and a bar of chocolate for dinner lol. In the middle of the night the wind was so bad that it pulled my guy ropes out of the ground and bent my tent over me ...thankfully being a pop up tent it bounced back, which I actually found amusing after the intial shock was over. So at 2am I was outside in gale force winds trying to bash my guy rope pegs back in to the ground. In the morning the warden came to see me and said " a bit blowy last night huh" - ya think? I can chuckle about it now.
Day 2 I went to a reserve by a river, there was no one there when I arrived so I had pick of where to pitch my tent, I chose right by the river. Made myself a cup of tea and some dinner and watched the sun go down over the canyon walls, it was idyllic. Went for an evening stroll and then settled in for the night. Two very valuable lessons were learnt that night - tip 1: dont camp right by a sheltered river, moisture and no wind = a swimming pool on the top of your tent. tip 2: don't leave the awning up as that too becomes a swimming pool on top and when you need to get up in the middle of the night(due to listening to running water ...tip 3) and forget the awning is there, bump it with your head, you get wet, very very wet !!
Thankfully I was on my way to a g/friends house next so I bundled my stuff back in to my car and headed for hers. It was a sunny and windy day so I managed to get my tent dry and all my laundry done. Thank goodness for wonderful friends huh. I spent a couple of days with her and then headed off towards a beach with a lighthouse I had always wanted to see at sunrise. The weather had started to turn at this point, but I pitched my tent and went for a walk on the beach. The walk was amazing, incredible rock formations that you could climb up and see the waves crashing upon them on the other side. I then walked up to the lighthouse but by this time the skies were grey and dark and the rain was getting harder, so i headed back to camp. Well the storm hit and the tent shook and the rain found every and any vent hole to seep through, it was a really crazy night - next lesson - if its forecast rain rent a cabin for the night - unfortunately I was due in Wellington to catch the ferry to the South Island so I had to pack up my tent and all my stuff in torrential rain and wind. By this time my enthusiasm for camping had waned so I booked myself in to a holiday park cabin, washed and dried everything I owned and had a hot shower and early night, the storm still raging outside.
Next morning I get a text from the ferry - delayed possibly cancelled due to high seas ahhhhhhhh. So I went to the museum, had some lunch, had a quick walk in the bitter wind and rain and headed off to the ferry. Another text - delayed ahhhhhhhh. Finally 6pm I boarded, it was the first time I have been the driver going on to a ferry so I was feeling a bit nervous about the whole thing but I really need not have worried myself as it was very easy. the crossing was ok, a bit bumpy and rolling like a fairground ride, but considering the sea conditions I thought it was ok, got in to port at 10pm and I headed for a holiday park that I booked before I got on the ferry.That was yesterday.
So here I am on the South Island. A cold but sunny day the park manager allowed me to pitch my tent up on the camp grounds to dry it out, it hasn't completely dried but it is good enough to use again. I went for a walk and looked around the marina (hoping to meet someone who would offer me a crew job hehe), then headed off in to the town to get some grocery supplies.
Tomorrow I meet up with another g/friend, I haven't decided if I am going to camp or cabin as I was informed that another storm is due early next week bringing more rain and snow. At this point i have to consider if I want to continue with my trip, can I afford to cabin my way around as that is a really expensive option for me. The alternative is to go to s21 for a few days and then head down to s23 where I am going to base myself until I have decided what I am going to do next.
Emotionally I have had my ups and downs, not so much about the camping issues; I seem to deal with everything as it comes up, no drama, just find solutions and go with it. However travelling around I see lots of couples doing the same thing and I have found that really hard. I had hoped that this time out would have cleared my head, instead I find myself missing h more, thinking about him everyday, I'm finding myself checking my emails in the hope I find one from him, or wondering if he will drop by when I go and visit s21. My head is telling me one thing and my heart is saying the total opposite, I really have no clue how to stop these feelings and put my tattered r to rest. Right now I feel more lost than ever and deep sadness that I no longer have the companionship, friendship and love from the man I married.
Don't get me wrong, my head knows that its not going to happen, he has made it clear that he is happy without me, I haven't heard from him in 3 months, he knows I am out camping, he knows I would have been in the recent storm, and yet he has not the desire to check I'm ok. It makes me wonder why he bothered making contact again, why when I asked if he wants continued contact he said yes, why disrupt the silence and then change his mind, its not as if there had been any conversation other than children and general chit chat. Sigh, i feel like I have the movie on constant loop again. I feel totally ridiculous, so much time passed and back to feeling this way again.
Anyway, I have to decide which road (literally) to take tomorrow, East or West ...... will let you know.
I hope everyone is faring well, love and hugs to you all, thanks for reading, listening, being here for me, I really appreciate it, my one safe place I know that I wont be judged for still feeling the way I do.
the park manager allowed me to pitch my tent up on the camp grounds to dry it out, it hasn't completely dried but it is good enough to use again. I went for a walk and looked around the marina (hoping to meet someone who would offer me a crew job hehe), then headed off in to the town to get some grocery supplies. 