I'm sorry to hear the news. It's crushing news. Keep posting, listen and use the advice here. The faster you pick yourself up and starting DBing the better chance you have at saving your M and yourself.
Now on to your H. What does he mean by if, "you come home this weekend he will D you sooner"? In other words he's planning on D you but you have time if you don't show up. That statement is him wanting his cake and eating as well. Sooner, really!!!
It's time for you to detach, let him go. Give him space. I know those statements are hard to hear. The faster you move out his way and work on your side the street, the faster you get to healing.
Stop cooking his food. Stop calling, texting and answering his phone calls. Stop being a convient option for him. He needs to feel what it is like losing you.
Read up on detachment. Reread it. Don't beat yourself up. This pricess is hard and it takes time.
You are an awesome woman. Treat yourself as such. Respect yourself and love yourself. We all have been where you are at and felt the crushing feeling you are feeling.
M:37 W:37 T:11 M:10 S17, S13, S10, S4 BD:06/28/17 OM confirmed 07/20/17 Recon the M 10/29/17 Working hard:2gether
Onward and forward
This process is not a sprint it's a marathon! Patience, Patience, Patience.
