Steve we are all seeing the same things - why are you not seeing it? This is an easy call. Sadly you think you are smarter than the average DBer. I can see it in the advice you try to give others.
Please SLOW DOWN. This is not at all the time for any major decisions. Any T fresh out of training will confirm that.
As for any purchase, let alone a home, unless you are in some rare US state with rare laws, it won't matter at all who's name is on the lease or deed. If you are M you and your W get half the assets and half of any debt. There is no real way around that.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D