I think it would all be much easier and simpler if his announcement of wanting a divorce was just to see your reaction and get affirmation. You clearly care and want to make things work. There wouldn't be such an impasse if this was all he needed to know. The issues are more deep-seated, but are probably mostly his own.
In a nutshell, he believes that he has changed and that he cannot give me what I want and that I cannot love him as he is right now. A year ago he told me that the man I loved was dead. Now, he says that he is not in love with me, hasn't been for years, and we got married too young and too soon.
Problem is, I don't believe him. It would be easier to believe what he says if he did not use absolutes. According to my husband he (1) never liked much physical contact, (2) never been very interested in sex, (3) never been overly touchy-feely, and (4) never liked holding hands.
All these things are simply untrue. He used to be an extremely affectionate and loving husband. The fact that he acts like he never was and says that he never was makes me doubt his whole "I changed" explanation. People who change acknowledge what they once were. There must also be a reason for change. He gives none. The best explanation I got is this is how he has to be in order to be good at his job.
He says he is happier this way. He doesn't look it.
Me: 28 H: 30 T: 9 M: 7
WAH: First half of 2017. Round 2 started in Spring 2018.
