Former WH, now LBS Please Help, close to Give Up

[betheoa]

Hi Sandi and Others,

Thanks sandy about your words, i needed it.

I have spend last days reading a lot about others LBS stories.

Now i have opportunity to writhe about things around me.
There was several days, i have being at home with kids (it is holy days and work off days). Some of the days WW was at work.
There was silents between WW and OM, until day before yesterday, when she write to him about his job celebration days (she was very polite, but not so flirty, he respond in very business meaner), yesterday he write to her about holly days, and she respond today again in very polite manner), he asked if she can take him for hair cut on Wednesday, she said ok, in not so much polite manner. Normally she will show so much happiness to see him, this time she was short), i am not going about look into it so much but there is two possible reason, first - she will try to slow the communication, second - last time when they go on date to eat cake (this day i stayed out of home ) at the evening they had chat, friendly, flirty ....but in the end when my WW said about him to have wonderfully, pleasant, lovely........night and dreams, he respond to her short and miss-wire her name with other family name. That spice some reality in my WW fog, about that, Maybe the OM has some other old/young ladies to chat/coffee/and being affectionate -- That was just to vent, it is not have nothing to do with my plan.

About my interaction with my WW. I keep to not be affectionate a all, and pay very less attention. Yes i handled, and did not move back slide about it. My wife tried to have chatty with me, i answered short or lough a bit, but in general did my things on PC.

She asked to help her cooking, i did it, but not overly enthusiastic at all. I was not sad or passive aggressive, just have done what need to be done than come back and do what i am doing on PC.

She tried to ask me to do some thing for her (bring for her something, give water ...) let say i did her request 1 from 4 request, when it is on my way, she noted this.

All days i avoided her, it was like she followed me. One evening, all they she was propose to go on shopping or else, just outside the house, i did not say nothing because it was not right request, it was just she talking ( in the past i will go where she want just at her eye glimpse), not it is different story . So then she asked do you want go out, in front of the block, i said fine. There was some neighbors there, so we had not so bed time. It was funny, WW was in cone with one woman, from other side i was doing some garden work and chat with other woman, this other woman is become little flirty with me, and start laughing in our convo, my wife noticed and come around to see what happened (and touch me, on the shoulder, and other famine things to show them that i am hers:)) - This is just situation, i do not reed on it.

More interesting situation was yesterday:
Yesterday she wonted to go with the kids to my father, this is out of norm, because 5 years ago when, i confessed to her about my affair, she called my father to talk with him about what to do, he was advising her to work thing out with me (she took the way of resentment and punishment and we are where we are), but she build resentment to my father because he later 6 months after their convo, he advice me to not live in a hell i live to, i of core talk to her about my and my father covo, and she was angry. So the last 5 years she was not wiling to talk to him by the phone. And yesterday she was pushing to go there and play with the kids on my father garden WTF?. How ever, we go there on the way i was silent as i am after drop the rope, when we goth there i was very chatty with all other but my wife. Generally we spend very good time all of us, then go home. I did not put nothing in this - only temp cheeking from my wife am i discus our problems with my father.

And today back to the norm, My WW told our sad story to her client (frequent client mail, who is look like someone she cant speak more freely), so i was painted as WH, controlling and mean. Who do what ever he wonted and not telling her what i am going to do. Who control her every move and so on. In reality there was not more 10 % truth, and eve this was trickle trout WTF? How ever, i an glad to have this info, this brings me close to the Drop the Rope mindset.
I am looking fro my flat.
It is looks like she prepare hers surroundings about our separation and possible divorce, to me the bad guy....i am OK with this, because i know the truth and that is important.
The rest of the time before i move to my flat, i will be very calm.
I am not going to confront nothing at all
I will cut her down men she show disrespect in front of me

This convo with her client really hit me hard from my internal sliding back, after the evening yesterday.

Will write soon