I think my head is spinning from how fast you seem to go back and forth. A few days ago, you were writing epic posts on your successes. Then Friday you were contemplating your apathy and desire for divorce. And now here you are feeling great again.
I wonder how you can try to slow down and just kinda 'be' for a little while. These swings are going to exhaust you.
Agree 100%. I do think she can sense the change in my attachment though and that causes her to want to bring me back in tight. Whether that is for real or just to manipulate and control only time will tell. What I can tell you is that I'm 75% of the time fine with whatever happens, 15-20% of the time ready to push things forward including towards D of need be. And only 5-10% of the time worried thatI might lose her. And that last % continues to fall over time.
As for GAL, i continue to hang out with friends. I'm working out but work often interferes with that. And I'm busy a lot. Some includes her (church events, D14 events, house viewings), some do not (shooting range, hanging with friends, working out, after work activities). But I rarely have down time. And I'm really in a good place emotionally the majority of the time.
One thing I've also done the last 5 days is haven't been calling or texting her first. I let her reach out first. Amazingly when I do that, the frequency of her initiated contact is goes up dramatically.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
