If you were to discover that your W is having an EA/PA, would that be a deal breaker for you?
Before answering, I want to point out something. First, I am not here promoting divorce as the answer to marriage problems. Now with that said, I do find it disturbing that you and your W were newly weds when she started showing signs of losing interest & attraction for her H. When you see sudden changes (less talkative, distant, cooler, needed more privacy, less attentive, less interested, less sex, etc.) it can certainly suggest that there is a third party.....somewhere.
Some men stay in denial by making statements such as, "I've decided to believe/trust her". All cheaters lie. So, even if confronted, she may not be truthful.
She sounds as if she is a "caring" type of person who doesn't want to intentionally cause you pain. However, if she does not feel in love with you, I think she'll try to conceal what is really happening.....b/c she knows it will be hurtful. There may not be a third person, and she may feel she made a mistake in getting M too quickly.....and now, she doesn't know how to get out of it without hurting you. That would make sense, if she was hoping you'd be proactive in getting the D.
I hope you will wait a good while before even thinking of having children with her. At this point, both of you are still very young with many years ahead. I hope you won't have to spend your life convincing her she loves you.
Some young ladies have a lot of expectations of a MR. If the H or the relationship fails to deliver everything she dreamed, then resentment sets in.....and can lead to other issues. It may be a matter of her needing to grow up more. If you were my son, I would tell you think very carefully and examine your heart about how deeply you feel for a woman who wants out this soon after the wedding.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
