Thank you Job for your wise wise words. She was the one threatening to move out or into the den, so perhaps I was mistaken to call her bluff and tell her I need the boundaries now too. Just this morning she went from being so huggy and needy to then flipping out that the playroom was a mess, screaming and lashing out at me and the kids, refusing to calm down.
I'm just confused as to what exact boundaries I set. I fear her wanting to be affectionate if she sleeps in my bed, and then having another repeat of the threats and abuse. I noticed she had her wedding ring off again and she said "we're not married" so I said "I can't be the chump" and took mine off too. Was this a mistake? Thanks for any advice, you're so kind to help out a newbie like me.
Me: 43 She: 43 Married 14 Together 20 D7 S6 Separation bomb Dec 2017 Reconciled 3 weeks later Jan 2018 Second separation bomb April 2018
