S - Yes it is normal, you will cycle but I don't think you are ready to get a D. You are still too focused on your W and what she is doing and what crumbs she is throwing your way. It's ok you are very early on and it is normal.
How long you stay in limbo is your personal choice but at some point in time you have to start to value yourself more than the desire to recon your MR. It appears that your W is still chatting with OM or as she would put it his "bestie" does that violate and of your personal boundaries? I am not saying it should or shouldn't but just know that if you chose to continue as is, it is going to be a very long, painful process because you are essentially hoping she will come around and pick you.
If your W knows that you know she is continuing to talk to OM and you just accept it and don't do anything about it I am not sure you are going to earn her respect. As you know women need to respect before they can love.
As LH told me things need to get worse before they get better. I would just suggest you start to think about what you are willing to accept or not accept and what your personal boundaries are. I know it is scary we have all been there as we lose control of everything that was important to us.
Just think about how you would respond from a position of strength vs just waiting around for her to dictate every move.
You seem like a good man Steve......hang in there!
