It's not meant as a manipulation technique. I am fully aware that nobody would mind if I stopped posting. We all have our own things to deal with. I appreciate the time and energy people put into responding, but am under no delusion that I could "manipulate" people here out of bringing something up.
I just don't understand the vehemence of the insistence that it "must" be true. I am totally on-board with preparing for that possibility -- that's smart. I am not comfortable with people here calling H a lying cheating scumbag. I want things to work with him, and at this point, even with all the intensity of the BD, etc., it is important for me to give him the benefit of the doubt until I know otherwise.
Did I think he would ask for a separation? No. I didn't expect it. I expected that if things were bad, he'd address them in a more honest and forthcoming way.
