In our relationship, I have always been the emotional one. I can get stressed out and lash out or overreact. It's a failing and I know that. I've worked hard to not act like this and my outbursts have been far more sparse than when we first got married. I don't mean to be hurtful when I do it and I apologize when I realize that I have crossed the line. Afterwards, I feel guilty for days.
My husband tends to keep things bottled in and lets them fester. When he is being hurtful, it is not a temper flare up. He is calm and intends for it to hurt. In those moments, he does not care about the pain that he causes. When the moment passes, he disassociates himself from what he said because in his mind, he's not that kind of a person. He neither apologizes nor eats himself alive over what he said or did. I think this goes along with being incredibly stubborn, which he is.
His emotional outbursts are rare and come in the form of sadness, fear, and grief. He usually needs alcohol before this can happen and, one way or another, they are always about abandonment.
Me: 28 H: 30 T: 9 M: 7
WAH: First half of 2017. Round 2 started in Spring 2018.
