No affair, no feelings...is there hope?

[44tries]

As MWD says, you dont make a 40 foot putt by aiming at the hole. You start by aiming at a place 3 feet away.

Love this.

You did. The first words are "I dont think divorce is the solution to our problems." What more do you need to say than that? I feel like it is clearly stating what you believe while also showing that you are understanding and accepting her decisions as valid.

I meant that I thought I was NOT supposed to say outright that I was against the divorce. She knows I don't think it's the solution. She feels that I have been the one dragging it on and I will never give up. She feels she has tried, and been unhappy, and I refuse to accept it (not her explicit words, but I know she becomes exasperated by my relentlessness). In her "talk", she expressed her feelings that she needs to do the selfish thing for once and hates to hurt me, but she thinks it's best to end it.

So I feel like my 180 (not sure if I'm using the term right), is to not fight back this time, at least with words (her sentiment is we talk and talk and get nowhere), and focus on the actions. My idea for this came from something I read about how if they think you have hope, they won't allow themselves to have it, and their resolves deepens...something along those lines. I'm totally open to it if you're saying you don't think this is the right approach, just clarifying because I think you might have misread my question.