So. I feel like trying to follow the rules and being detached makes me cold. Like... I feel artificially cold and weird around H. I know he's been surprised that I haven't brought up the relationship, that I seem to be doing okay. He said he might go spend time in a cafe alone tonight, and I encouraged him to do so. I think he is puzzled. We'll see.
I am torn between doing 180s that are doing things for him and not doing them. Thoughts?
