Olya, it sure sounds like your H is going through some major health issues. Depression seems very likely given everything you describe, and the low T may be a contributing factor as well. I'm not an MLC expert, but it doesn't sound like he's MLC to me (usually there would be wreckless spending, affairs, a sudden interest in personal appearance, etc.)
It sounds like you are doing well at GAL although I would not call what you are doing LRT because you are still constantly around him and doing things for him. You mentioned that he's supporting you financially so it sounds like maybe you are doing this to maintain that support and if so I do totally get it. Just understand that your sitch is likely to be stuck in limbo for as long as you maintain this arrangement.
He's never been good with money and the affair he's having is with his male buddy. They're both straight, so, at least I don't have to worry about STDs for now.
You are right in that I am in a very precarious position and that I am walking on eggshells. If I push him too hard, I will be in a very bad position.
That said, I am done with doing a lot of things for him.
First, I'm done cooking. I used to spend my time every Saturday meal-prepping for the week. We're not talking rice and ground beef. I'd make gourmet meals for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for him to take to work and to have at home. Currently, he's fending for himself and he's on a steady diet of salad with the said ground beef, eggs, and power bars. He has been supplementing with frozen tamales that I bought two weeks ago before our fallout. I certainly do not intend to pick up more when those run out. He can drive across town to get them himself.
Second, I am not doing anything that will make this process easier for him, certainly not when it's at our expense. He wanted us (translation: me) to pack up the house and quit the lease while he's in Kuwait. His logic is that this will save money. Sure. It will. However, I will be the one packing, hiring movers, dealing with paperwork, and finding storage rental. I will also be the one who will have to find a new place to live and set everything back up again by the time he comes home next February or March. I'm not doing that. This is my home and I intend to return there on holidays and long weekends throughout the time when he is gone. I have no intention to spend my 1 month off during the summer packing the house and then spend the first half of my 2019 spring semester finding him a new place to live. And I have zero wish to make the whole separation process easier for him than it has to be. If he wants these things done, then he can bloody well do them himself. He will not, of course.
So, I'm doing what I can.
Me: 28 H: 30 T: 9 M: 7
WAH: First half of 2017. Round 2 started in Spring 2018.
