No affair, no feelings...is there hope?

[Olya]

Oh, you're right! This IS similar!

Here's my suggestion. First, drag this out until you are done with your master's program. Sorry. There, I said it. It may feel wrong, but you made the choices you made because your W let you believe that you were a family unit and that you could rely on her while you tried to better yourself and your lives together. Now she is ripping the carpet from under you. I am not saying that you should not take steps to secure your independence because you absolutely should. However, you should also remember that divorce takes time. Even if you are not in a place where you can have a reasonable talk with her about your timelines (and it CAN be dangerous to have that talk), it is on her to file and until the divorce is final, you are under no obligation to move out.