I'm confused by you saying you don't know what is happening. But I was like you in a way. I felt "confused" b/c my x's behaviors and actions were at odds with who I BELIEVED and HOPED he was.
But the actions were who he was and are who he is today. So there's no real confusion on his end. Your h does not yet benefit by filing for divorce, either financially and or due to his public image concerns.
But he's not saying or acting like a husband, towards you.
Instead of wondering what HE wants or plans, let's take a look at what YOU will accept before cutting your losses...
(IF IF IF there's a chance he will wake up to the loss he caused, there has to be an actual loss. So far, there's no loss to him. Classic cake eating, which seems to lessen their respect of the LBS). He's walking all over you and it's not endearing him to you at all. Just the opposite.
In other words, appeasing him is failing. And it's probably eating away even more at your self esteem.
Hang in there, you are not alone.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
