And still struggling

[Jim1234]

Jim, I hope everything turns out well for your kids after these temporary setbacks and I hope you're getting somewhat close to the end of the divorce process. One thing that strikes me about your posts is the sheer endurance it takes to get through a divorce. It seems like there are so, so many issues to settle on.

Thank you. I expect my kids will be alright in the end, but I have to remember it's hard on them, too. In my case D just keeps dragging on. It doesn't have to, though, if both parties are reasonable, and move the process forward. Look at Joseph9.

That's nice to hear you're dating. Does that mean like dinner or coffee with different women here-and-there or do you have someone special? I really wonder a lot about this issue. I can't even imagine ever going on a date.

"Dating post DB" should get it's own forum because there is so much to discuss, I think. It means all of that. It started out with dinner or drinks or whatever with any woman who struck my interest. Sometimes there was no chemistry, sometimes it became quickly apparent we were just looking for different things. I was very up front and honest about not being ready for a relationship. I've had some pleasant evenings, and no disasters, yet. There is a woman I see once a week or so. Maybe more. She is very respectful of my need not to jump into a relationship. We just enjoy each other's company, and she is someone else to do things with.

Don't wonder too much about it. You are still a long way away from there, but I assure you, when you are ready, interested men will appear.


It seems normal to me that you'd worry about your wife. You spent decades with her and loved her all those years. You must have initially come to this forum because you wanted to save your marriage. It's hard to stop caring about our spouses, especially when they leave us and their lives are such a mess. It's so hard to understand why someone would walk away from it all rather than put in effort to fix what went wrong.

You're right about all this. Coming here has really helped me put down the rope, and realize I can't fix it alone.
All I can do is be the best me I can, and they can either come along, or not.