Hey all.......sorry for the delayed response. I worked five 12 hour shifts in a row, and when I work like that I don't have time for anything but sleep and work. I am in the middle of 4 days off and decided to pack up the car and take the dogs for a short trip to the beach.
Skyhigh......as always, thank you for replying and making me think about things. No need for the apology for the 2X4s or 4x4s......I honestly didn't feel that what you were saying was harsh.
Gordie.....thanks for your thoughts on the wedding ring issue.
Things between H and I have gotten worse. It has been 10 days and we have not spoken to each other.......we are living in the same house. When I found those text messages I was pretty upset and moved into the spare room and have been there since. He has not made any attempt to speak to me about those texts, or why he felt it necessary to keep them on his phone. Or, for that matter, apologize to me for lying about the relationship he had with this person.
On a few of the mornings I was getting ready for work and was also trying to make myself breakfast....not a big breakfast person but some of the mornings I was starving because I didn't get to eat dinner the night before. Anywho......when breakfast was ready H would bring it to me. Now, why would he do that if he wasn't speaking to me? A few other times I would come home from work to find my bed had been made by H. Again, why would he do this, but not speak to me? One night I was at work pretty late and he texted to ask me if I was okay. Again, we were not speaking to each other so why is he asking? He has since stopped bringing my breakfast, stopped making the bed and I was at work late again one night and he didn't check on me. WEIRD?????
Yes, the lack of affection is something that makes me ask myself "why did he ask me to move back in with him if he wasn't ready to give of himself in that way?" When I first moved in with him we were intimate, we were both trying hard to make sure that we took things slowly, but then we had a pretty big disagreement about his parents and my lack of wanting a relationship with them and that is when he started withholding affection toward me.......things have not been the same since. Maybe he thinks I can be his plan B......WRONG!!!!!
His "friendships" with women is something that bothers me. He is aware how I feel about that, but he doesn't see anything wrong with it. Why he feels like he needs to continue these type of relationships when he knows how I feel about them is something that screams ...... "I don't care about you and how you feel." He is someone who needs A LOT of praise and I guess he isn't going to get that from a male, so he reaches out towards women. I'm sure that screams something about his childhood, or "mommy" issues. He will have to figure that out for himself.
I do think his lack of following through with finding a counselor has something to do with the fact that he will have someone asking him tough questions. He might feel challenged and not want to answer those type of questions. Right now the Landmark program is a one way self analysis. He does not verbally participate at his Landmark meetings......he only listens (this is what he has told me).
So, I continue on. I will be heading home tomorrow. I have not heard anything from H while we (myself and the dogs) have been gone. I did not expect to hear from him, so it isn't surprising that I haven't.
I plan on stopping and seeing a good friend on the way home who I haven't seen in a while, so that will be nice.
