I am really sorry. You are a good dude and are going to be just fine. I can tell you from experience that in time you are going to feel a big weight lifted off your shoulders. In my experience there is no worse feeling in the world then limbo.
Actually, there is something worse than limbo. It is thinking that you've turned the corner, that it is safe to love again and make yourself vulnerable, that your marriage and your family that you thought might be dead is now saved... and then to find out it was all a lie. I've felt both. This is way worse.
H53/W51, R-ing 4/'18
"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires"-Sg.of Sg 2:7
"So oftentimes it happens,that we live our lives in chains, & we never even know we have the key"-Eagles III 1:3
