Then one day he stopped by to see our daughter and she bumped into a door that was open. Suddenly he got mad at me and said it was my fault the door was open and I should keep it closed. I said "Ok, sorry, I'll keep it closed." His response was "You're an adult, not a five year old child." This was a really rude and abusive type of response. It's not something my normal husband would ever say. Then he came to the living room and told me not to leave my laptop on sofa because our daughter could bump into that too. He looked at me and said "I don't think we'll ever be together in the future. I just want this divorce to go smoothly."
This, Nicole, is where you need to really need to toughen up and respect yourself. This man has no business talking to you like that especially when he is not raising his own child. This is not where you apologize. This is where you say "I will not be spoken to that way" and leave the room when he does.
I want to find a kind gentle way to say this, and it may not come out that way, but what I am saying is all in good intention.
You cannot show that you are weak and scared. You are appearing weak and scared to him. Not only is that unattractive, it is not what you want to show your D. I think he has made you feel somewhat beneath him and inadequate for so long you are beginning to act like he views you. He is a physician, not a God who deserved to be bowed down to. I am nurse and I have worked with some who have that complex, but most are very down to earth and treat everyone with respect. I have physician friends. Yes, it is a very demanding career, and many careers are demanding, but everyone's effort and time should be respected. Now go get your stuff when it is convienient for you, who cares how angry it makes him. That house and stuff is just as much yours and it is his.
I know it hurts. But the reality right now of who this man is right now is what you have to work with. You can do it.
