Please see a lawyer asap and then get a plan - EVEN IF you want to stay married. Knowledge is power.
Meet and talk with a L and you do not need to retain a lawyer but you do need info. Especially with a special needs son.
Thank you 25, I will look into an L. We live in a small town (well, kids and I do now, H moved down to bigger city), so I may have to look in other cities. But my boss's H is an attorney, I'm sure he'd be able to point me in the right direction. I have been looking into divorce involving adult Special needs children, and H may end up paying child support for forever. Pretty sure that's not even on his radar (even though he says he will always take care of me and s21, no matter what). He does pay me every week. But, like I stated in my first thread, I am getting my ducks in a row.
Originally Posted By: 25yearsmlc
In your case, there is a part of you that sees your h's historic self indulgence and in my case, a lot of what my T has helped me see, is how much my needs were shelved and I felt I could take it, I could fill my love tanks "later",
but there was no "later". I was never to get "my turn", in my m. I thought we were past his irrational Alaskan obsession and I felt that he'd reward my loyalty and devotion and endless forgiving, but I was wrong.
I became the touchstone for him to do whatever he wanted, and know the home fires would still burn and the kids would be okay.
I understand the "shelving" of my needs. I have put ME on the back burner to take care of everyone else.
And I figured out that I'm in a weird type of the angry stage. I'm not angry at H, anger isn't going to do me a bit of good. I don't need to be angry, H is angry enough at the world for both of us.
Me-44,H-44 S21,S19,S17,D13 M-22,T-29 (off and on prior to M) BD:12-20-17 (H said he had things to work out in his head) H moved out:3-4-18
