Just my humble opinion. The old texts from OM..... I wouldn't mention that at all. She probably did keep them as a sentimentality at that time, but probably forgot she did and just never deleted them. And I would imagine that she would have a reaction to them being gone if she was still looking over them in a sentimental way. So I would hold off saying anything on that.
This doctor. Sandi said it best. She may have no intentions, but the doctor does, and she is not affair proofing the M by spending time alone with the doctor and oversharing things about her personal life. I think many affairs begin this way (I believe my own ex's did) and it's not even going in with that intention, but it happens. ANd you know I am one of the most liberal on not controlling what the WAS spouse does. But this just seems like asking for trouble. Again, I don't think this is her intention, she just doesn't understand some boundaries. This would be worthy of being brought up and why it makes you feel uncomfortable and I do believe you have a reasonable compromise.
I feel like she needs some decent girlfriends to confide in. I believe we all need one or two close confidants we can talk about the most personal stuff to, outside of our spouses, but she her choosing isn't the best.
