And still struggling

[Jim1234]

Are you still working on R or have you completely given up? If you still hope to R, then be accommodating during the divorce proceedings. Kill her with kindness. She won't know what hit her.

She's moved out, so I don't really see her much. I am not pursuing her at all. I'm GAL, and while I haven't completely given up on the relationship, she expresses no interest in it, and I'm ready to move on. Throughout the entire process, I've tried to be honorable and respectful, while protecting my interests.

I'm glad you took the time to think about it, if you move forward now then I think you can be confident you are doing it rationally and not as an emotional reaction.


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Is a 50-50 split what you were planning on? Let's say your assets are 300k, so 50-50 would be 150k each. a 55-45 split would cost you how much? In my example it would be 165k/135k instead of 150k/150k so it would cost you an extra 15k. Is 15k worth fighting for? Maybe it is to you, maybe it isn't.

I will tell you that my peace of mind and spirit was worth the extra money. I have zero regrets over that.

[color:#000099][color:#330033]I was expecting a 50/50 split, and believe that's fair. Maybe we can make it work that it's 55/45 before tax, and 50/50 after. I don't know, but I have lived well below my means my whole life, and we're talking a difference of about $80K. I don't care who you are, that's an amount worth fighting over.

And personally, I think I would sleep better knowing I fought over it. I don't mind the divorce process so much, but knowing she took so much advantage of my good nature would upset me for the rest of my life.

[color:#000099]You gave me some very sage advice, and I'm glad I listened.

Glad to hear your son is taking this seriously, sounds like you did a great job handling that with him!

I think it's all going to turn out alright. Thanks for your kind feedback.

Well, my attitude about D is protect yourself, but be reasonable.

I believe 50/50 is entirely reasonable, and anything more than that, I would have a hard time letting go of. I mean, I could give her more than that, but $80K? GMAFB