V that's a brilliant idea. I was married for 24 years and basically never looked at another man during that time. Perhaps it was a lack of imagination, but I was busy rearing kids and loved my husband, so I never even flirted.
Back when me ex had his affair and I was DBing the marriage back together the first time, one 180 for me was to lighten up a little, be less serious. I don't know what the different vibe I was giving off was about, but suddenly the world was full of men flirting with me. Maybe I just finally opened my eyes to see it. Or maybe I carried myself with more of a sense of possibility, I don't know. Men joked with me in the grocery store line, young men tried to invite me to their house parties as I walked by on the street. I thought, "wow, why wasn't it like this when I was young and single?". But I can see now that I was projecting a more approachable, less defensive, more fun version of me than in my twenties.
One thing I've learned in midlife dating- confidence is sexy. Dress in what makes you feel good, be friendly and outgoing (even if you're an introvert like me). I'm now much more likely to chat with a stranger in the Starbucks line and you never know who you might meet.
