Living in the Present, only Looking Forward

[Coconut]

Well Latin night was anti-climatic. No ones fault, it was the first time that any of us had been there, so no one knew what to expect. Me being from an area commonly referred to as Northern Cuba, I imagined something similar to past experiences, but I should of known better than to expect such experiences in NC.

Basically it was what I like to call a "hook up house" (local bar where the regulars just looking for hookups), and just another "theme night". Good news is I didn't have to dance, bad news I didn't get to dance.

As I sat there, at the hookup house, I wondered what the "regulars" thought of the life they live, if they had dreams they thought might come true there, or if it was just all about the moment. I really try not to judge, I'm ok with people living their lives, doing what it is that makes them happy, but I often wonder how far past the next 24 hrs some people imagine.

I have had a true one night stand once in my life, it was a surreal experience that I stumbled into at a hook-up house. It wasn't intentional, I was young, about 22, was out with friends partying and we ended up at this local bar not far from closing time. I was drunk when we got there, don't remember much about how I actually met her, but do know that I was dancing with her when "it's closing time" was played. She said she'd like to keep hanging out but we couldn't go to her place, she was very adamant that we couldn't go to her place. I have often wondered since then why we couldn't go to her place, she was my only one night stand, so things have triggered memories of her. After BD, 20 yrs later, I did wonder if she was M, although I didn't have any reason to think so at the time, I just thought it was because she lived with parents.

Anyway, let's just say that was an unfulfilling night for me. Hours and hours of time spent in every position I knew to try, I finally just said forget it and she took off. I knew her for a total of about 4 or 5 hrs total. Nothing about that night made me feel good.

So as I sat at Latin dance night, looking around at all the people (btw woman outnumbered men 2 to 1), I wondered how many MLC people I was observing. The thought of a 30, 40, 50 something person, showing up at a local bar night after night, feeling the rush for one night at a time, only one night at a time, made me sad. I did it once and it made me miserable in the morning (I've walked away from plenty of other "opportunities) and I wonder if they feel that unfulfillment in the morning too, then look for the next rush that night. I don't know, intriguing, I do hope it makes them happy, just not my thing.