JoeJoe1, your answer made me thinking. At first, I thought I'd really do my best and that my H is just demanding too much: listening to him for one hour fully focused despite of badly behaving children and, important, without asking any questions. Then I thought, no, it feels like an hour, but it is a quarter, children are badly behaving anyway, and what is so wrong about not asking questions. He often feels investigated, criticized and attacked if I start asking questions even if my intention is to better understand him. But why not just listen? It is not important that I do know each and every tiny background detail. It is important that I listen.
So thank you for making me thinking.
This, however, brings me to another question. I am really suffering because the entire sitch is so ambivalent. He says that he is fully determined to separate. He is refusing absolutely ANY physical contact for one year and has moved out of the MBR. He tried to get to know other women via online dating. Still, he shares so much of his life and thoughts and emotions with me, every day and in addition to raising our children together. We weren't the often seen couple sitting speechless in a restaurant, we used to talk a lot and still do. Unfortunately, he currently refuses to go out with me as a couple without our children. Can you imagine how hard it is for me to do the LRT and to detach in such a situation?
